August 23, 2020
Fishwrap Transcript: The Largo Resignation Address


What follows is a Fishwrap Transcript of Largo's Resignation Address. Before resigning, Largo issued a decree that henceforth, the Fen President need not be a Fen.

Cassia Allin says, "Greetings, Lord Paramedic."
Cassia Allin says, "Welcome to the Alliance Castle."
Cassia Allin says, "You'll need to 'hail the tower' if you wish to enter."
Largo exclaims, "The press is here!"
(Largo dusts off his shirt.)
Largo exclaims, "Wonderful to see you!"
Largo is sharing experiences with you.
Paramedic asks, "Are you holding this shindig inside?"
Paramedic says, "And good to see you too"
Largo says, "I was thinking in front for dramatic effect."
Largo asks, "Would it play better if we did it inside?"
Paramedic says, "here works I think"
Largo says, "Good, good."
Paramedic says, "Huh"
Paramedic says, "is it supposed to be inaccessible?”
Largo yells, "Hail the tower!"
Paramedic says, "I have forgotten"
Paramedic says, "Oh"
Largo says, "They're just very dramatic about the whole thing."
(Jamboree smiles)
Skirwan leaps down from some rocks.
Silky says, "heya"
Largo exclaims, "Hi Silky!"
(Skirwan waves.)
Silky says, "wow good people around :)"
(Paramedic smiles)
Largo thinks, "We are gathering in front of Alliance Castle for my brief remarks. All are welcome to join! If you're having a tough time finding it, come to West farms and someone will show you the way."
Paramedic says, "Puddleby's elite is showing up"
Largo exclaims, "The cream of the crop!"
Largo exclaims, "And Skirwan!"
Paramedic says, "aged exiles"
Fearr exclaims, "Rawr!"
(Largo nods!)
Silky says, "we are so old :)"
Largo exclaims, "SO old!"
Largo exclaims, "Hi Fearr!"
Paramedic says, "So old..."
Silky says, "yeah..."
(Skirwan ignores the outgoing Fen President's twitterings.)
(Largo ignores Skirwans ignoring.)
Largo says, "One moment! Pun'isher is lost."
Kathius thinks, "Mork fallen to Gorvin for quite some time now."
Skirwan says, "No more lost than most of his supporters, I fear."
D'Ead thinks, "typical"
Paramedic says, "People don't remember where the Alliance Castle is"
Kathius thinks, "is there an arena or something?"
Fearr exclaims, "Fearr is always an option!"
Sabin Figaro thinks, "may need to depart"
Paramedic says, "This castle was always a white elephant"
•You seem to heal more effectively.
Paramedic says, "A Puddleby boondoggle"
Skirwan thinks, "SNN reports: Largocratic rally delayed as Fen President Largo's campaign staff get lost on the way."
D'Ead thinks, "he was fallen in town yesterday"
Largo exclaims, "But here it is!"
K'vynn is now Clanning.
Silky says, "ahah"
Inu Teisei is sharing experiences with you.
(Largo rolls his eyes at Skirwan's perpetual heckling.)
(Ryder waves)
Largo exclaims, "Hi Ryder!"
(Jamboree waves.)
Skirwan says, "Ryder's like a zodiac old and HE knows the way."
(Inu Teisei waves)
(Paramedic prepares a hand-crank camera with a fish on the side)
(Largo puts his notes in order.)
Ryder says, "i found this place a few weeks back with snacks"
Pun'isher thinks, "KPUN reports" Largogrataic rally coverage underway"
Fearr exclaims, "Rawr Borzon!"
Silky says, "Hello Kvynn"
Largo exclaims, "!"
Ryder says, "sometimes i do something that appears to be useful."
Largo says, "That's a good trick, K'vynn."
Ruuk ponders, "beer"
K'vynn is sharing experiences with you.
K'vynn says, "Malkor taught me that one."
Largo asks, "Let's get this started?"
Largo says, "Thank you all very much for joining me here today."
Largo says, "It's wonderful to see so many old faces, and some new ones too."
Largo says, "I have two statements to make. I could have just sent them directly to the papers, but I like attention."
Largo says, "I'm sure you all sympathize."
Pun'isher thinks, "KPUN reports: Largo addresses the SRO crowd in front of the picturesque Castle grounds"
Skirwan ponders, "story checks out so far"
Largo says, "First, I will issue a Presidential decree."
K'vynn ponders, "SRO crowd?"
(Paramedic raises eyebrow)
Pun'isher ponders, "standing room only"
Inu Teisei says, "ooh decree"
Skirwan thinks, "SNN: KPUN reports standing room only... while lying on the ground."
(K'vynn isn't president, yet.)
Largo says, "From here on forward, candidacy for the position of Fen President will be open to all citizens of Puddleby, not just fen'neko."
Inu Teisei exclaims, "yay!"
Largo says, "If anyone wishes to challenge this decree, I will defend it in court."
K'vynn asks, "does that not make them a fen President then?"
Inu Teisei says, "It's Punny vs Skirwan vs Mighty Largo"
Silky says, "aahah"
Inu Teisei ponders, "will all fen be their servants?"
Largo exclaims, "Great question, K'vynn!"
K'vynn ponders, "Fen President vs President."
Silky says, "The end of fen supremacy"
Paramedic says, "Thoom"
(K'vynn purrs ahead.)
Largo says, "With that said and done --"


Largo says, "I hereby tender my resignation as Fen President."
Skirwan ponders, "Ahhh. That feels good on my knee."
(K'vynn senses something)
(Inu Teisei cries)
Paramedic exclaims, "!!!"
Largo exclaims, "It's been a wonderful and very long term!"
Borzon ponders, "About time."
(K'vynn purrs ahead.)
Largo exclaims, "We've accomplished a lot over the years!"
Pun'isher thinks, "KPUN reports: Largo Resigns!"
Inu Teisei asks, "Does this mean you're leaving the lands?"
Largo exclaims, "Absolutely not!"
Inu Teisei exclaims, "Yay!"
Silky says, "you'd better not"
Pun'isher thinks, "KPUN reports: But vows to stay!"
Paramedic asks, "Does this mean you're coming back to the lands?"
Largo says, "I've been gone for a long time, we all know that."
Largo exclaims, "Yes!"
Silky says, "nice"
Pun'isher ponders, "its like he never left"
Inu Teisei says, "Double yay"
Largo says, "As a friend, not a leader."
(Fearr purrs.)
(Aspasia smiles.)
Paramedic says, "How can we miss him if he won't go away"
Burrito is now Clanning.
K'vynn's parrot flaps its wings.
K'vynn exclaims, "!"


(Largo is drenched.)
K'vynn ponders, "a storm i can't calm."
Paramedic says, "Rain on me"
Inu Teisei asks, "So do we get to start the Largo Army?"
Skirwan says, "Odd weather we're having."
(Aspasia opens up a parasol.)
Fearr ponders, "Is that the cry"
Silky says, "my yearly shower"
Pun'isher thinks, "KPUN reports: Thunderous applause!"
Silky says, "yay"
Ruuk says, "ugh a weird microcosm"
(K'vynn didn't bring his rain cloak.)
Inu Teisei says, "lol"
Largo exclaims, "My parade!"
Paramedic says, "I forgot how bad wet fen fur smells"
(Inu Teisei laughs at the rain)
Silky says, "lol"
(Inu Teisei is Rolling on the floor laughing)
Pun'isher thinks, "KPUN: when will he end this rain?"
(Inu Teisei recovers her composure)
Largo says, "Well. That's unexpected."
(K'vynn twitches the end of his tail)
Inu Teisei says, "time for soap"
Pun'isher thinks, "KPUN: charismatic crowd is clouded"
(Largo raises his voice over the thunder.)
Aspasia says, "Clearly the land weeps for the end of the Largocracy."
Largo says, "I will take your questions now, if there are any."
Paramedic says, "It's raining on the Largo parade"
(K'vynn flattens his ears)
Largo exclaims, "Maybe so!"
Largo exclaims, "It's time for some new leadership, though!"
K'vynn ponders, "that was a short speech."
(Paramedic raises a flipper)
Silky says, "resignation always sad"
Inu Teisei thinks, "Who want's to join the Largo Army?"
Largo asks, "Yes, Paramedic?"
Skirwan asks, "What assistance will you be offering your successor to ensure a smooth transition of power?"
(K'vynn looks up.)
Paramedic says, "and who do you recommend for the next Fen President"
K'vynn ponders, "wee hours of darkness."
(Fearr eyes his wet fur)
K'vynn ponders, "thunder and lightning and rain... an omen?"
Largo says, "I am not prepared to make an endorsement today."
Largo says, "We will have to see who steps up."
Largo says, "There are a number of wonderful exiles who'd be perfect for the position."
Pun'isher says, "KPUN: Largo will endorse a candidate soon"
Largo ponders, "And some who wouldn't be."
(Largo glances at Skirwan.)
Inu Teisei says, "lol"
Skirwan asks, "But you are committed to supporting the winner of a free and democratic election?"
(Paramedic writes down "Largo endorses no one, inviting chaos")
Largo says, "Obviously."
(Ryder raises his hand)
Largo asks, "Yes, Ryder?"
Skirwan ponders, "will support... anyone... who wins..."
(Skirwan takes notes.)
Inu Teisei thinks, "Fen president for life largo lives on, as just god Largo"
Ryder asks, "as a newcomer to the island, how does the voting procedure work?"
Silky says, "hehe"
Largo exclaims, "Excellent question!"
(Paramedic smiles)
Pun'isher exclaims, "KPUN: Largo commits to counting the votes himself!"
Largo says, "A mysterious council puts forward a list of candidates to the ballot hall in town."
Pun'isher thinks, "KPUN: Largo commits to counting the votes himself!"
Largo says, "Then we all vote. I've never had much knowledge of that part of things."
(K'vynn noes Inu stepped up.)
Inu Teisei says, "lol"
Pun'isher ponders, "there is one for the blooper reel"
(K'vynn notes Inu stepped up.)
(Paramedic raises a flipper)
Skirwan asks, "Largo, any comments about rumors of a potential Bartok run? Would you support a victorious Fen President Bartok?"
Inu Teisei says, "um no"
Largo asks, "Isn't Bartok dead?"
Largo asks, "Yes, Paramedic?"
Skirwan says, "Heck if I know."
Paramedic asks, "Where have you been all this time??"
(Inu Teisei tries to escape)
(K'vynn believes Inu is an excellent Candidate.)
Largo exclaims, "It's a long and sordid story, Paramedic!"
Inu Teisei exclaims, "trapped!"
Largo exclaims, "But I'm glad you asked!"
Skirwan says, "Wow. Orga voters come out and you guys just kill 'em."
Pun'isher thinks, "KPUN: orga hecklers invade the castle in attempts to thwart the election"
Inu Teisei says, "I am president of Largo Army, self appointed."
Tumarr says, "sorry"
Borzon ponders, "Voter oppression?"
K'vynn ponders, "a coup."
Tumarr says, "reflex"
Largo asks, "Next question?"
Pun'isher thinks, "KPUN: In an apparent coup, chickens"
Paramedic says, "hm"
(Borzon raises his hand.)
Skirwan asks, "Why now, Largo? Why not much, much sooner?"
K'vynn ponders, "did someone bring a pet?"
Pun'isher thinks, "KPUN: Inu bravely fights orga hecklers"
Largo asks, "Yes, Borzon?"
(Largo ignores Skirwan.)
Paramedic ponders, "is the Alliance Castle usually infested with Orga?"
Skirwan thinks, "SNN: KPUN continues to support the suppression of Orga voters."
K'vynn asks, "why are we not in the safety of the castle?"
Pun'isher thinks, "KPUN: Largo supports Orga-nic participants"
Largo thinks, "Is everything alright in town? We're being pestered by Orga at the castle."
Borzon asks, "How did you choose this place for specific speech?"
Ruuk asks, "How long was your term Largo?"
Borzon asks, "Is it to distract the masses from an what can only be described as a disastrous term?"
Pun'isher thinks, "KPUN: Invasion....or privacy at castle"
Inu Teisei thinks, "I am not KPUN, I am self-annointed president or newly formed Largo Army for Largo worshipers"
Largo says, "For optics, mostly."
Largo asks, "Who has described my term as disastrous?"
K'vynn ponders, "ouch."
(Borzon writes down "distracting".)
Largo asks, "Besides you?"
(Skirwan raises a hand.)
Pun'isher thinks, "KPUN: Largo will pay his supporters with cat nip"
(K'vynn notes dissenting.)
K'vynn says, "hmmm"
Borzon says, "You're the one answering questions, not me."
K'vynn's parrot nips him with its beak.
K'vynn ponders, "ow!"
Largo says, "Clearly."
(K'vynn tries not to show he's in pain.)
(Inu Teisei mews at K'vynn)
Largo asks, "Any other questions?"
Pun'isher thinks, "KPUN: You radio station with "All fax-similied!""
Paramedic says, "When do you break out the refreshments?”
Largo sets down his heavy pretzel box.
Paramedic says, "Now you're talking"
Largo exclaims, "It's a long and sordid story, Paramedic! But I'm glad you asked!"
(Pun'isher partakes in pretzels)
(Inu Teisei steps away)
Inu Teisei ponders, "must watch my girlish figure"
Pun'isher takes a pretzel from the box.
Largo sets down his heavy ale keg, deftly fitting a spigot into the bunghole.
(K'vynn came for the 'nip.)
Paramedic exclaims, "Even the snacks are long and sordid!"
(Borzon writes down "stale pretzels".)
Pun'isher crunches on a pretzel.
Largo sets down his heavy stout keg, deftly fitting a spigot into the bunghole.
(K'vynn flattens his ears)
Silky says, "not sure I understand why you resign once you are back"
Largo pours himself a perfect mug of cold stout.
Largo raises his stout in a hearty toast.
Pun'isher pours herself a perfect mug of cold stout.
Pun'isher raises her stout in a hearty toast.
Inu Teisei asks, "why is the Alliance castle bridge up and not down?"
Largo exclaims, "It's time for new leadership!"
Pun'isher raises her stout in a hearty toast.
Pun'isher raises her stout in a hearty toast.
Al Ive says, "to free himself up for the emperor position"
Largo says, "Better to resign than to be driven out."
Pun'isher raises her stout in a hearty toast.
Pun'isher raises her stout in a hearty toast.
(K'vynn bows.)
Largo raises his stout in a hearty toast.
Pun'isher raises her stout in a hearty toast.
Silky says, ":)"
Largo exclaims, "Excuse me!"
Silky pours herself a perfect mug of cold ale.
(K'vynn purrs.)
Pun'isher raises her stout in a hearty toast.
Silky raises her ale on high, and drains it in one gulp.
Al Ive pours himself a perfect mug of cold stout.
Al Ive pours himself a perfect mug of cold ale.
Skirwan says, "It's a castle. If we just left the door open all the time it wouldn't be very secure."
Pun'isher raises her stout in a hearty toast.
(Silky raises her mug: A la santé de Largo)
Pun'isher thinks, "KPUN: Largo gracious, generous, and with impeccable manners"
Largo exclaims, "Cheers!"
Largo raises his stout on high, and drains it in one gulp.
Skirwan takes a pretzel from the box.
Pun'isher raises her stout on high, and drains it in one gulp.
Skirwan crunches on a pretzel.
(K'vynn notes Largo's tactic of getting the pea... er.. people, drunk and full.)
Largo says, "I'm going to squeeze to the east to lay out more snacks."
Skirwan says, "Not a bad pretzel, Largo."

Posted by Para at August 23, 2020 10:47 PM

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