September 30, 2006
Stick Lord


Hoggle has created a new animation.

Posted by Para at 10:55 AM
Newbielympics Results


Himitsu reports to TMN that results for the Newbielympics are being posted to the Winds of Dawn forum.

Posted by Para at 10:02 AM
September 26, 2006
Junko Returns


Miratisu sent the following report to TMN:

Hi Para,

Junko came back! He still won't give me the teapot or any of the other stuff in his junkyard, like the orga drum or the barrel of beer. He said "An't got nuthin back there, but always lookin fer more!" Maybe stuff that's too old isn't collectible.

Anyway, Super Chicken and Fiona came to look too. At least he wouldn't give Super Chicken the teapot either. Super Chicken threw a kudzu seed into the junkyard then asked Junko to get something for 15 coins. Junko opened the gate and went inside. The zu seed was the only new thing, so he got it and gave it back to the chicken, who had thrown it in in the first place.

That was funny.

Anyway, I hope I can still get the teapot eventually. I will keep going back to try. When I get it, I want to give it to J'nder. Notice to Super Chicken, teapots are for making tea, not for gnawing on! I will stuff you inside the teapot first!





Posted by Para at 11:29 AM
Measle Passes Third


Measle reports in his most recent journal entry on passing the third-circle test.

Posted by Para at 11:18 AM
September 19, 2006
The Newbielympics Are Coming!


The Newbielympics are coming to town! They will take place between Saturday, September 23rd and Sunday, October 1st, 2006. For more information, see the Newbielympics scroll.

Posted by Para at 10:55 PM
Exile vs. Tank


Hoggle has created an animation of an encounter between an exile and a tank.


Posted by Para at 10:04 PM
Large-Trunked Beast Stomps Multiple Mystics, Others


Noivad sent the following report to TMN:

CoNGA had an open hunt on Metzetli Island a few days ago. Boondoggle came out of hiding long enough to talk with some exiles, including Entil'Zha. I couldn't listen to much that they were talking about because of the dangers we had to watch out for. Boondoggle mentioned that he'd seen creatures much larger than those we've discovered in previous exploration trips there. We were pretty deep in Metz's jungle when a new creature that looks very similar to an elephant came charging out of the jungle.

After much suffering, the group of 30-40 exiles that came on the hunt managed to trap the creature and heal all the fallen. After that we used a coordinated attack that managed to take down the creature, which then Garr chained. On our way off the island, we passed by the area with the giant pit in it. Boondoggle when to investigate the pit and accidentally fell in. The group did not have strength nor time to rescue Boondoggle. Boondoggle, however, has been in worse spots before and survived using his knowledge of the area. The group, led by CoNGA's Crunch, managed to all make it back to the beach's cove with only one loss due to bad weather. Garr took the corpse to town center where he remained as long as he could keep his eyes open to show everyone around the discovery. I include a quick sketch I made here, so that everyone may gaze upon the creature in its natural state.


Kalypso sent the following report to TMN:

Esteemed Paramedic,

I've spent most of my time as a new exile (yes, actually new, why does everybody keep asking me that?) exploring Puddleby and being felled by rats, slugs, and vermin. As such, I was very eager to go on the recent open hunt to Metzetli Island so that I could be felled by all manner of new and exciting things. Crunch was our leader, and it was the largest gathering of exiles I've seen thus far, with perhaps 40-50 in attendance. Boondoggle even joined in the hunt, which I hear is quite unusual as he has stayed in town most of the time as of late.

Never having piloted a boat before, I fell twice on the way to Metzetli (oh hush, you were a new exile once also, yes?), but Crunch was kind enough to help, and everyone waited patiently on the shore for us to arrive. While there, I learned how to fall gracefully to all manner of creatures. I was poisoned, burned, trampled, mashed, clawed, bitten, and spat upon by the local fauna, but the wonderful healers in attendance fixed me up every time. By the end of the hunt, I was even able to do a very little healing myself.

I did a couple of sketches of a very large proboscidean beastie we encountered, though I didn't get its name. It surprised us and felled most of us, but we regrouped and it was slain. I wish I'd gotten a sketch while it rampaged, but I was busy being trampled. Garr brought the beastie's carcass with us and dragged it all the way back into town, where it was a sight to behold.



Your humble newbie,

Posted by Para at 07:46 PM
Chaos Storm #460


Chaos Storm #460 has swept the Lok'Groton island chain. Please post any changes you have observed and wish to share with others in the comments. If you don't want to read possible spoilers, please do not read the comments.

Posted by Para at 07:25 PM
Exiles Get Stomped!


More information coming soon...

Posted by Para at 08:50 AM
Boondoggle and Junko Missing


Miratisu sent the following report to TMN:

Hi Para,

Boondoggle is missing from the pub again. He must still be in the pit on Metz Island. I was there when he jumped in. It was during the open Metz hunt with Conga a while ago. Boondoggle joined us there. We were warned not to jump into the pit because we wouldn't be rescued, but Boondoggle jumped in anyway. We thought he would depart and come back to town, but apparently he didn't and must still be there. Do you think we should form a group to go and look for him?

Also, Junko is still gone from the junkyard (but the teapot is still there). However, there's a new Junko now in his place, it's a scavenger bird.



Posted by Para at 08:21 AM
September 14, 2006
Sielk's Orga Images


Sielk has a number of interesting images and comments relevant to the recent unpleasantness with the Orga.

Posted by Para at 11:50 PM
Agratis Yttrane


Measle is back, and he has posted a report on his cousin, Agratis Yttrane.

Posted by Para at 11:30 PM
Azriel's Big Journal Update


Azriel has updated his journal, providing exiles with a bounty of information about a variety of developments over the past few Chaos Storms. A must-read for all regular TMN viewers.

Posted by Para at 10:55 PM
Return of the Chicken


Creed sent the following report to TMN:

Hail Para!

It seems that the rumors are true! Both Chance and I had occasion to see Chance's long-lost clan-sister . . . er . . . clan-chicken in town just recently, doing what he does best. Super Chicken has returned!

Our lil' chicken friend has made several short trips into town from wherever he's been hiding out . . . I mean studying all this time. He's entertained Town Center with loud horn blowing and bouts of chicken morphing, but of course, the crowning achievement was a very good-sized GrabFoot™ line. Sadly, it wasn't long enough to equal a record, but considering how long we've all been without the Chicken's teachings, it's amazing any of us remember how to grab on to that foot and gnaw . . . I mean hold on.

All hail the Chicken! Bawk!



Posted by Para at 10:44 PM
September 13, 2006
Chicken Season


Zynx sent the following report to TMN:

Heya, Para

I am happy to report the return of our beloved Super Chicken. He arrived back from his migratory flight south on Lundi, day 24 of Winter, 564 around 2pm Puddleby time. We will now be able to, once again, enjoy the cheerful noise of his horn, his musical bawking, and the playful nibbling of our various appendages by that beak of his.



Posted by Para at 11:34 PM
September 11, 2006
Junkyard Update


Miratisu sent the following report to TMN:

Hi again Para,

Here I am in the junkyard. As you can see, Junko's still gone, still hiding in the back room. See the teapot still there? When he comes back, I hope I can get that teapot, which I want to give to J'nder so we can all have tea!

that's all for now, bye

Posted by Para at 11:34 PM
September 06, 2006
Clan Lord Advertising Contest Deadline Approaches



Delta Tao is holding a Clan Lord Advertising Contest.

The contest includes two grand prizes: one for best Web page and one for best banner ad.

Deadline for entries is September 9, 2006.

Discussion can be found on the Clan Lord Sentinel.

Posted by Para at 09:21 PM
September 05, 2006
Bartok's Retreat Across East Field


J'nder sent the following report to TMN:

Hi Para!

Here's more sketches for you of our recent encounter with Bartok.

They show Bartok retreating across East field and in Snagglewood until we finally lose him through a previously unknown path.

There's also a picture of healers clearing purgatory and one of the Orga Army heading to town.







Posted by Para at 08:10 PM
September 04, 2006
Bartok's First Appearance


If you'd like to read about Barktok's first appearance, check out these entries from Paramedic's Notebook, deep in the TMN archives:

Destruction of the Altar
Restoration of the Altar



Posted by Para at 10:36 PM
More on the Return of Bartok


Shakyamuni has posted to Kith and Kin a report on the return of Bartok and some additional thoughts.

Posted by Para at 10:18 PM
Blue Exiles, Cats, and Orga


Creed sent the following report to TMN:

Hail Para,

I had a number of items to share with you! One is minor, I suppose—in light of all that is going on in Puddleby these days—but the sightings of groupings of exiles in blue continue. Please see the above sketch!

I thought I would contribute a few sketches I made from the recent major orga onslaught and the reappearance of Bartok. I know you've already posted some, but I am attaching a few more that might show some different aspects of the conflict. One that I find interesting shows several orga, of different sizes and colors, all crying out Bartok's name—it's clear he is their god, their general, their chieftain, or all three.

On a slightly lighter note, it's been discovered that our friendly helper cats can even help with the orga problem. Several exiles including myself have witnessed the amusing sight of a very frantic and distressed orga, trapped behind a tree in North Town with nothing but a sleeping Mittens in its way. (Actually there was a vermine trapped there too.) You can see from the attached sketches that Yhoo and I watched for a few minutes as Mittens toyed with her prisoner then went back to napping.

All hail the friendly killer kittens!









Posted by Para at 09:37 PM
Bartok Emerges


Kyloter sent the following report to TMN:


Got a shot of Bartok breaking out of the temple. Apparently some unnamed fallen person here confused Bartok with someone else. We almost had him down, then he started pulling and running like a scared little orga.


Posted by Para at 09:03 PM
Junkyard Changes


Miratisu sent the following report to TMN:

Hi Paramedic,

Today I went to throw another old shoe into the junkyard (in South Farms) that I caught while fishing. When I got there, I found out that Junko now asks something different. Normally, he just straightaway asks if you want to throw your selected item into the junkyard or to select an item if you didn't select anything. This time he first asks if you want to throw anything in. If you answer yes, then he continues like before. But if you say no, then he asks if you want him to get anything from the junkyard for you, but he says it will cost you 15 coins (he actually says "15 big ones")

I didn't say yes the first time, but I sunstoned about it. Some other people like Kinon, Thunder, Talanah, and Trowa came to check it out. Then something funny happened. Trowa finally said yes to getting something from the junkyard and paid 15 coins. Then Junko tried to get inside but couldn't! He said the gate was stuck (and he gave a refund). He said it would be fixed in about a zodiac. Then he went into the back room of the junkyard. Did you know the junkyard has a back room? It's in the north wall of the junkyard.

Anyway, when I left, Junko was still hiding in the back room, so there's no one there now, and nobody can throw anything into the junkyard. Hopefully Junko will come back soon, and the gate will be fixed, and we can get things from the junkyard. It will be like the raffle, you never know what you will win. P.S.: I want the teapot.

bye for now,

Posted by Para at 08:31 PM
Farming in Town


Bakunan sent the following report to TMN:

And they say the Sentinel is useless. Law'n St'ple has taken to raising goats and farming zu in the Zoo.

-Bakunan (herding goats is much easier than herding frogs)

Posted by Para at 08:10 PM
September 03, 2006
Exiles Nearly Eaten by Orga


Savior sent the following report to TMN:

Greetings, Paramedic.

I'm sure you have many reports of today's resurrection of Bartok. Wave after wave of attacking orga hit the fields and town until the orgas were able to dance in the return of Bartok.

Some brave exiles chased him all the way to the snell south of Katpus' cave where they saw him disappear into the trees. Rescuing was done and orgas cleaned up out of Camp Dred and Dredwood. When it seemed back to normal, with the Envy and Malices and Mallocks eliminated from the first few snells of Dredwood, Jo'Maril suggested we look at the place where Bartok disappeared. Jeepers, who has a degree in T.H.A.P. (Thoom of Horus and Advanced Pathfinding) agreed to give it a shot.

The path opened, and we all fell as we couldn't wriggle our way back out of the path in time. But where we fell . . .

Bartok's stronghold

One of his minions chained us one by one over to the west side of the snell. Then the Zealots came and chanted us to his priest's hut. He then built a fire and began to cook us!

Teffin on a spit

We finally departed out of there. Seems the lesson of the day is that the orga weren't trying to steal the altar . . . the priests used it to call Bartok back from the dead. Who knows if they will try to steal it in the future? Additionally, Bartok plans to conquer the other tribe of orga and make them "Bartok's Tribe."



Posted by Para at 10:36 AM
Exiles Enter "Bartok Land"


Mellion sent the following report to TMN:

Hello Paramedic,

I'm sure you've heard about the massive Orga invasion today and how Bartok has come back. Well, some exiles followed him to a PF path that's very hard to get into.

We gathered a group and headed that way with Savior opening the path. We all died upon entry, but here's a sketch of Bartok telling us to go away from "Bartok Land."

It's a very dangerous place with no rides, despite some similarities to Phineas Land.

Your friend Fen,

Posted by Para at 10:20 AM
Bartok's Back


Blackhand sent the following report to TMN:

Alright, today there were orga around pretty much all day. It was a crazy day: Bartok, envy, and, of course, lightning everywhere!

Take a look at the sketches I took. Beer to yar all.




Posted by Para at 10:11 AM