June 28, 2006
Cats Step Up


Lummox sent the following report to TMN:

Howdy Para,

Cats around town seem to finally be doing their part. Pun'isher brought the town's attention to this kitty in South Field, which was busy felling any hostile creature in its sight. It was stronger than its appearance suggested, and (from what I saw) took down anything from rat to rockodile with minimal hassle. It was friendly towards our party, though it couldn't be healed. The brave kitty eventually met its end fighting a rockodile.



Posted by Para at 09:58 PM
Sick Critters


Talin sent the following report to TMN:

Dear Para,

I was on my way to help rescue Jade Noids when I encountered first an ill vermine, then many more ill creatures in East Field. I tried all the healing and curing skills that I possess. Moonstone, staff, potions . . . nothing would help vermy or the other ill critters. I am very concerned. Now it is vermines, later it may be all the critters we hunt. Mangy skins is just the least detriment from those illnesses, in my opinion. We must find a way to cure or heal them!


Posted by Para at 09:45 PM
Skein of Silk Still Unsolved


Fundin sent the following announcement to TMN:

I'd like to call everyone's attention again to this ongoing challenge. Very little interest has been shown so far! Either no one is interested or it's just too hard. Either way, the challenge remains open! If you have ideas, please let us know.

Wanna earn 13000c?

Simple, just show us what the use is behind this item, called a skein of silk. You can read more about this challenge on the Clan Lord Sentinel.


Posted by Para at 09:35 PM
Blow It with the Winds


Delirium sent the following report to TMN:


I am pleased to announce that The Winds of Dawn will be holding our seventh coining contest, "Blow It with the Winds!" on July 15th and 16th. The purpose of this contest is to raise funds for our upcoming Newbielympics. All exiles are welcome to form teams of four or so and compete for fabulous cash prizes! If you can't find a team, we will be happy to find one for you.

To sign up and read the full rules, see:


The image above is from our last contest.


Posted by Para at 07:48 PM
The One That Got Away


Hoggle sent the following report to TMN:

Beware all fishermen and fisherwomen! Read this, for it might one day save your life!

I was out on the docks just kinda throwin' out a few casts in the wee hours of the night and wasn't really catching anything good . . . then I felt somethin' heavy at the end o'my line. It was some type of strange sea monster! I managed to pull it onto the dock and a fight ensued.


The creature just seemed to stare oddly at me as I swung my gossamer blade like a madman, unable to land a single blow.


Before I had a chance to morph . . . bam! the google-eyed sucker beast pulled me into the watery deep!


I found myself underwater without a breathing potion to my name. I managed to get through a maze of seaweed and spotted some type of underwater sylvan lookin' gal off in the distance . . . unfortunately, I found myself rather short on breath, or I would have engaged her in a bit of conversation.


Glub . . . glub . . . glub. It all went black.

So, I lay fallen for a good 5 minutes and contemplated my assured depart from this deathtrap ocean. How am I supposed to toggle for here???? Anyways . . . as I lay there grumbling about my current predicament under the dark blue sea, I washed ashore and was found by Nesse. He got me a healer and I lived for another day.


I searched the beach for some time but was unable to find that creature. I am offering 5,000 coins and my great axe to the person who killed it (if they stuffed it). I would really like to put this odd creature in my house. thank you.

P.S. ALWAYS carry an underwater breathing potion with you if you fish!


Posted by Para at 12:38 AM
June 27, 2006
Zynx Reports: Jade Noids


Zynx sent the following report to TMN:

Heya, Para.

The most interesting thing occurred outside of Jade Noids recently. It was near midnight (IC) when Blackhole calls me over to Jades to take a look at something unusual. He tells me it is visionstone-worthy. So I trotted over to Jades to see what he is talking about.

Sure enough, something VERY unusual is going on: there is a Jade standing outside the Jades cavern. It is motionless and non-hostile. So, while the other folks are bashing away at the Jades inside the cavern (they were rescuing some folks, I think) I set up my visionstone equipment and started taking pictures.

1. My first encounter with the Jade Noid; at this point I was not sure if it was hostile or not so I kept my distance . . .


2. This is where I realized that this immobile Jade lacked any mandibles to attack me. Some kind of strange mutation among their species, I guess.


3. Here we see some of the folks that were hunting the hostile Jades in their cavern come out to heal themselves. A few of them commented on the Jade and its predicament while they rested and prepared for another round of Jade spelunking. As you can see, the Jade is injured from a recent attack of leeches.


4. Oh, the effectiveness of the Dank Marsh leeches, dangerous to exiles and dangerous to toothless Jades. As you can see the jade is suffering at the hands of some leeches. I did nothing to help because of the pain I have suffered at the hands of his fellows in the cavern below.


5. By this time, the jade was on its knees, its pinkish blood gushing into the swampy water that it was standing in. I felt, for a moment, sympathetic, but not for long. It filled me with awe to watch tiny little leeches kill such a large and (normally) dangerous beast.


6. The Jade finally died in this visionstone image. I felt no pity, nothing. After taking this visionstone, I packed up my bags and left. It was a good day of visionstoning!




Posted by Para at 10:47 PM
June 20, 2006
Chaos Storm #447


Chaos Storm #447 has swept the Lok'Groton island chain. Please post any changes you have observed and wish to share with others in the comments. If you don't want to read possible spoilers, please do not read the comments.

Posted by Para at 11:40 PM
Undine, Puddleopedia, CoNGA


Sielk has updated his journal with reports on Dark Temple combat, the Puddleopedia, and a recent CoNGA hunt.

Posted by Para at 11:01 PM
Boats, Beer, and Bards


MaryJane sent the following announcement to TMN:

The Dwarven Militia is proud to host one fun and exciting day. We will start the excitement with a Boat Race in the tradition of our Volympic competition:

Follow a pre-given route.
Drink beer at certain spots, then race to the finish line.
Beer will be provided.
Rules and prizes are listed below.

Next, everyone will retire for a party and Bard Contest in the Bard Yard. Exiles will listen as the Bards compete to compose the DM's new drinking song. Prizes for first, second, and third place. Rules and prizes are listed below.

Date: Soldi, Day 35 of Summer 563
TIme: 10:35PM
Meet: Centaur Island
(OOC: July 30, 2006 2:00PM PST)

Boat Race prizes:
1st Place: Great Axe + 2.5K
2nd Place: Iron Helmet + 1.5K
3rd Place: Keg of Beer + 750c

Rules: Exiles follow the designated course and go from island to island drinking a beer and then moving on. Each contestant needs to submit a visionstone of their race before recieving the prize. Energy Potions are not allowed and will result in a disqualification. Sprint charms are not to be used and will result in a disqualification. Rangers may not equip their Belt of the Wild or attempt morphing or they will be disqualified. Ethereal Boots are not to be worn and will result in disqualification. EPS or Portal Stones may not be used and will result in disqualification.

Bard Contest prizes:
1st Place: Choice of either fine piece of wood, a judder ingot or a torjo shell + 1000c
2nd Place: Choice of one of the two remaining items + 750c
3rd Place: Last item + 500c

Rules: Write a drinking song befitting the DM and our love of beer. You must perform your work before a panel of judges in the Bard Yard. The judges then will retire to vote. The decision of the judges will be final.

Posted by Para at 10:13 PM
June 16, 2006
New Wendeckas


Connie Crete sent the following report to TMN:


K, so it were a day like any other day. I were out drinkin and carousin and coinin. I noticed there were more Full Mystics about and mebbe I were due fer my permotion. (tha number o full mystics were more'n tha number o d'Moks - a good yardstick). Anyways, so there I were in tha passes bashin tha wendies and takin their lunch muny when Valtrim asks me ifn I'd keel vermines fer him up in Camp Dred.

Actually, he said "ya minds escortin me ta camp dred on accounta because I *feels* that sumthin be not right." . So I moseys there as fast as my drunked legs kin fetch me. And there be Hepta and Malkor too. They reports that Ansset went inta dredwoods and already dun been ported ta orga village.

So fer like half a second we stares at dredwoods but Valtrim shows there be large death vermines and Ansset needs tha rescue. So other fighters and healers starts showin up and folks says "lets go through tha foothills." Well, we moseys inta tha cave and simultaneously folks charge in ta fight tha munkies and Valtrim shows us there be new munkies in tha lands. Twilight and Gloamin Wendies. I fergits which be which

We recovers causn Malkor does tha mystic chain ta fetch alla tha falleds back yonder and sum dun been pebbled beyond recognition. I coulda gotted em, but Ima slow. So fetches em ta town. Some moseys off, sum stays. Finally a small but versatile group dun gathered: Valtrim, Malkor, Hepta, Yotaro, Janus, Mora d'Mok, me, 'frit, Kani, Andarius and Egbert d'Mok. We makes headway, but caint really take control o tha first snell o tha foothills beyond camp dred. Megami tha Great and J'nder comes and we is off!

Slowly, painstakinly we lures and keels one atta time. We advances a couple o snells inta tha foothills and we finds large twilights and large gloamins. Thats these pitchers here. So time passes. Slowly. Keel a munkie, git cocky, attack tha next one, 2-3 fighters fall, regroup... rince - repeat.

Midway through tha foothills, Hepta and Yot and Mora gots ta go (because did I mention this were slow huntin?) So we trades thems fer Lorikeet. We has a nasty time gitn back tagither and almost keels everybudy. Finally is all up and happy and we makes our way forward agin. Poor Ansset. So we gits ta almost tha exit o tha foothills (ya know that bloodhawk backspawn gaia I hate that snell) and there be 10+gazillion o tha large twilights. Did I mention they throwed rocks? Omega and Daimoth joins us and then the critters is all daid.

A quick one, two, three, and we is at orga village and gits Ansset. The End. I didn't think ta git pitchers till almost tha end causn I figgured other folks would be. Did I shake tha camera?



Oh, fer alla rank hunters out there, they was all sltrs. No point in lookin fer em. Easy ta hit, got kilt fast. Seriously though, they was mangy - not as good furs as tha midnight wendies.


Posted by Para at 09:47 AM
Necro is Back


Largo sent the following report to TMN:

Many of you may know of the recent Dar'shak invasion. Both Puddleby and the ocean were under their control for a long while, a horrible display of the Theocracy's power and resources.

What less of you probably know, is the cause of the invasion, and some of the events that took place during it. I cannot write every detail of this long story right now, but all that really needs to be said is that Necro is back, and more powerful than ever.

There is no knowing when he will strike next, but we know that he will strike again. Be on your guard even more than usual, but don't be satisfied with just that. We have to go on the offensive while we can. It only takes a few minutes to empty the horde, clear the dark chambers, or kill a liche. Please spend those few minutes to help keep their numbers down. Our combined efforts can and will make a difference.


Posted by Para at 09:14 AM
Dark Chamber Crowd


Aravir reports in his most recent journal entry on an expedition to a Dark Chamber packed with undine.

Posted by Para at 08:44 AM
Peaceton: A New Hunting Ground


Saffire sent the following report to TMN:

Hi Paramedic,

The new attraction in Peaceton is—big surprise—a hunting ground. (With hindsight, this should have been an obvious guess, since hunting is about the only activity most people find attractive.)

The entrance to the Peaceton hunting ground looks similar to the Game Preserve in the South Farm, but entry is by admission at the gate. Inside can be found big cats and snakes. I didn't stay more than a few seconds, so I don't know if other types of creatures are there or how large the area is.


Fortunately, the rest of Peaceton is as peaceful as ever, with the mindlessly aggressive creatures shut away in their own separate area. I hope they don't ever escape and "invade" Peaceton town, though I wouldn't be surprised one bit if it happened.

Still, it's sad to see a small community with a different culture having to pander to the tastes of their larger neighbor because of the demands from the visitors. I guess that's what Peaceton is, a tacky tourist resort, which people visit occasionally but don’t want to stay in. They’ve introduced a "new attraction" which is alien to their own culture specifically to cater to the favourite activity of Puddleby residents, but haven’t opened up any job openings in their local businesses (bowling alley, jewelry shop, horse stables) for any who might like the place and want to stay.

Oh, and yes, I've decided to move to Peaceton and live there. Talk about having the worst timing ever.


Posted by Para at 08:19 AM
Aravir Returns


Aravir has returned from an extended stay in the library and reports in his journal on trips to the Cloud, the University of Puddleby, and Ash Island.

Posted by Para at 05:59 AM
Dark Vermine Dilemma


Zynx sent the following report to TMN:

Heya, Para.

Well, I thought that the Bolok swarms on Kitty Beach were bad, but today outside of Rocky Cavern we were overwhelmed by hordes of Dark Vermine. I was hunting with Auralie and Blackhole We all fell in the initial assault. Maelmianore came to help; he fell too. Calil came to help, and he nearly fell as well, but with the help of Echo the healer everyone was saved!

All these swarming critters are starting to make me wonder, boloks on KB okay, but Dark Vermine outside RC, now that's unusual.


Posted by Para at 05:49 AM
Boloks on the Attack


Zynx sent the following report to TMN:

Heya, Para.

The other day Blackhole and I decided to go hunting in the South Forest/Kitty Beach area. We had barely gotten started on KB when we were ambushed by a horde of boloks. We were overwhelmed quickly. Pe Ell, who came to help, also fell. A friend of mine, Maelmianore, fell as well, departed, and with the help of Su'uub III managed to get the situation under control. I estimate that we killed 50 or more boloks on the beach by the end of it all.

Here is a picture of one of the swarms. This is the swarm that attacked us the first time round.


Posted by Para at 05:30 AM
June 10, 2006
Sielk on CoNGA Trips


In his most recent journal entry, Sielk reports on two recent CoNGA trips: one to the Abyss and another to the new Orbing book.

Posted by Para at 08:14 AM
Sativa's Lecture


In his most recent journal entry, Measle reports on Sativa’s recent lecture on phantasms.

Posted by Para at 08:05 AM
It's Not the Heat, It's the Humidity


Merlisk sent the following report to TMN:

Hey Paramedic!

Recently, a group of us took over the Abyss. Do you know why it's so steamy? The pic shows all.


Posted by Para at 07:54 AM
Figwit and Wigfit


Creed sent the following report to TMN:

Hail Para,

I had the privilege tonight of helping as midwife at the birth of BooBoo Kitty's new bundle of joy . . . or actually . . . BUNDLES! That's right—BBK became the proud mother of twin boys in the late evening on day 73 Autumn 562. Little Figwit was born first, with Wigfit making his appearance about 45 seconds later.

I made a number of sketches during BBK's labor, which was unfortunately disrupted several times by a pie-throwing Kinon. I didn't get sketches of poor BooBoo covered with messy pie.

But as you can see, once the twins were born, many well-wishers came to watch them take their first steps and enjoy their birthday cake.

Congratulations to BBK and Largo, and to Figwit and Wigfit: welcome to the world!






Posted by Para at 07:23 AM
June 07, 2006
Chaos Storm #445


Chaos Storm #445 has swept the Lok'Groton island chain. Please post any changes you have observed and wish to share with others in the comments. If you don't want to read possible spoilers, please do not read the comments.

Posted by Para at 11:51 PM
June 06, 2006
"Secrets of Share Toggling" with Revelor


Fiona sent the following announcement to TMN:

If you're fallen and can't get up, Professor Revelor will explain how to get help with the "Secrets of Share Toggling" this Friday, June 9 at 2:30 PM PST (That's GMT -7). This class will include actual rescues.

Discussion: "I've Fallen and Can't Get Up" at Clan Lord Sentinel.


Posted by Para at 08:25 PM
June 04, 2006
PAG's Pitch Cave Discovery

cj_parker2.png azriel_celebrates.gif

Cj parker and Azriel sent the following report to TMN:

The following message may contain spoilers. If you don't want to read possible spoilers, please do not read the information below.

We took a detour in PC1 to get a few folks to the first PF-training book. As everyone was signed up and leaving the SW pit, Noivad asked Azriel if he could remind him where the path next to the book went to. Azriel jumped out of his boots, made sure he wasn't joking and immediately ran back to take a look. Amazingly, clear as day, there was a 2-sparkle path right next to PF Book 1!

Noivad and Azriel hopped through the path into another section of library, which contains a single book. It has the same sunstone image as "Book 4", but when we bumped it, we could not comprehend its lessons. The book is titled Tart'targ's Orbing Gates.


However, once everyone came back to look, the two Mystics along, Sylune and Org du Lac, were able to start training with this book, in the art of orbing gates, whatever those may turn out to be. With luck, this training will reveal a way further forward!

We have some theories upon this book's purpose, and we took Sylune up to the EP to get some experience, but we are still in the early days of our research, and the full purpose has yet to be known.

-Cj parker/Azriel

Posted by Para at 11:01 AM
Skein of Silk


Fundin sent the following announcement to TMN:

Wanna earn 13000c?

Simple, just show us what the use is behind this item, called a skein of silk. You can read more about this challenge on the Clan Lord Sentinel.


Posted by Para at 10:53 AM