November 30, 2004
ELF Purchases a Clan House


Kazik reports in the ELF Blog about the purchase of a clan house and on this week's ELF clan hunt.

Posted by Para at 04:20 AM
November 29, 2004
Portal Problems


Fundin sent the following announcement to TMN:

"A small group was moving the portal back to Camp Dred and it got temporarily stuck in Pitch Cave 1. Due to the fierceness of PC1, we were unable to move it to safety. As a result, we have moved the green portal to a safe location in the kitchens. You can still exit the cloud safely, but don't enter the green portal in the kitchen. It leads to PC1 at the moment.

"My Pitch Assault Group will try to remedy this on their next trip and return the portal back to somewhere where it will be less likely to cause departs. We go in three days time, so not too long.

"For now, apologies from all who moved it. We tried something IC to help us, but that didn’t work and screwed things up. We have done our best to fix it short-term until it can be fixed long-term."

Posted by Para at 06:44 PM
November 28, 2004
Pata Nguvu


Phineas sent the following announcement to TMN:

"There is a new clan in Puddleby! There are five members of Pata Nguvu: Ankti, Arne, Jwahir, Navaia. and Ulla."

Posted by Para at 02:02 PM
A Pun Day at the Fair


Mjollnir sent this announcement to TMN a while back. My apologies for not getting it posted sooner.

"The Grand Punfair was a great success and thanks go out to everybody who entered and provided us with oh so many puns.

"Congratulations to the winners:

Limerick Contest
Winner: Cyan
Prize: 2000c

Tall Tales Telling
Winner: Destian
Prize: 2000c

Grand Punfest
Round 1 - Topic: Food and Drink
Winner: Connie Crete
Prize: 1000c and an orgaberry cluster
Round 2 - Topic: Nature (Plants and Animals)
Winner: Amethyste
Prize: 1000c and a luck bone
Round 3 - Topic: Music
Winner: Merlisk
Prize: 1000c and a steel pot

"A spot prize of 500c was awarded to Elena for 'Stinker of the Match' for her musical pun 'When Rhone and Sabine have a baby, it will be Destine's Child.'

"I would just like to thank everybody who donated money and prizes and to everybody who turned up to make the day a great success."

Look below for more images and some winning entries.




Winning Limerick
I know a fine Zo named Ootog
Who's sence of direction is odd
He yells lets go east
and vanquish some beasts
but went west to slaughter the lil frog

Winning Story
Let me tell you a little story
about a dwarf named Connie Crete
from every bar both near and far
they’d reserved this lass a seat
Lager from tap or jugs of whiskey from the shelf
she could open her throttle and throw back a bottle
as quick as the devil himself!
Connie Crete!
Now word got around that Connie Crete was no pretender
they’d quake in fear and lock up the beer
when Connie went on a bender!
If she came a knockin’ at your pub
you’d be sellin’ the place by dawn!
She’d be drinkin’ at seven, by 10 to 11...
well, all the booze would be GONE!
Connie Crete!
It was five in the evening, on a warm Puddleby night
Connie barged into the healer’s bar, the doorman gave no fight
She had money in her pocket, sylvan whiskey in her eye
Git up off yer asses an' set up th' glasses!
I’m drinkin’ this place dry!
Now all the serious boozers, they were soon broken-hearted
when Connie finished off six
and she was only gettin’ started
Guzzlin’ down the pints
and inhaling the bottles like air!
Hebark had warned that the malt might have turned
But Connie just didn't care!
Connie Crete!
So Connie drank the whole damn bottle
had another pint or two
when it made no impression she started a session
with a barrel of honey ale brew
She was finishing her keg
when her face turned green
Good Gaia! Connie fell down after ONLY fifteen!
A crowd of folks had gathered
even watching from out the door
As nine large Ghoraks
lifted Connie off the floor
A healer looked her over
That’s gotta be a first!
Cause it’s not what yer thinkin’, it wasn’t the drinkin’...
This dwarf died o’ thirst!


Posted by Para at 01:36 PM
Portal Trap


Borkiron submitted the following report to TMN:

"Klur, with the help of Pogue Mahone's pet spriggin Malkor, was moving the portals again to set up a small trap. I managed to catch them just as they set it. Folks might be interested in the method they used. They had moved the green portal out of the garden into a spot in south Puddleby, just south of the chapel/Purple Tor Inn and near the gate to west town (Image 1).

Image 1

"Malkor started to teleport himself and Klur immediately pushed him into the portal (Image 2). Malkor disappeared and the portal vanished with him.

Image 2

"Of course, nobody knew where the portal was (Malkor asked for money to return it), but someone suggested going through the green mirror on the cloud to find out. So that's what I did. Imagine my surprise after making the long, long trip to find that the green portal was back in the garden (Image 3). I must admit this was quite funny, despite everything. It really was the scenic route I took.

Image 3

"After I got over my surprise and amusement though, I realized it was a trap: they had positioned the portal just inside the entrance to the garden, so that anyone entering would not be able to avoid falling into it. Quickly, I sent a warning to everyone about where it was, and dragged it away from the entrance. Of course, I could not avoid going through it, but at least I would find out where the other end was. It turned out to be (I think) Dredwood or Snaggy. There were twisty trees and lots of orgas. I managed to get back into the purple portal but got hit several times in the last few seconds by a big orga and fell just as I portalled out (Image 4).

Image 4

"I found myself back in the garden, with the knowledge of where the portal led and the trap at the entrance still unset, temporarily at least. All that running about was so exhausting that I had to sleep for a while until Harper and Paranoidos found me, fortunately just before Malkor did (Image 5). Haffron also came for the rescue attempt a few minutes later.

Image 5

"Later, I found out Harper and Paranoidos had adjourned a University of Puddleby board meeting to come rescue me. I felt guilty about that but even more grateful to them. It's nice to know that there are people who will put their own plans on hold to make the effort to help others, even though there are others whose only plans and efforts seem to be to hurt others. However, I've decided that with the portal moving nonsense starting up again (maybe), it's a good time to take a study-vacation. Bye to all for now, and see you again whenever. Good luck and have fun."

Discussion of the portal trap can be found on the Clan Lord Sentinel.

Posted by Para at 09:35 AM
November 27, 2004
Sylvans' Dream


Kazik has filed a report on the new treehouse housing complex at the ELF Blog.

Posted by Para at 12:36 AM
November 26, 2004
Movin' On Up


Azriel reports in his latest journal entry on the opening of the treehouse housing complex and the shortage of antivenom bandoliers.

Posted by Para at 06:34 PM
November 25, 2004
Ethereal Invasion/Coin Hunting


In recent updates to the ELF Blog, Vequalir reports on an ethereal invasion of Puddleby and Lundar reports on Maeght's class on coin whoring taught through the University of Puddleby.

Posted by Para at 07:17 AM
November 24, 2004
A Trip to Sarra


Lundar reports on an expedition to the land of Sarra in his latest post to the ELF Blog.

Posted by Para at 12:31 AM
November 21, 2004
Trees of Terror


Read about ELF's expedition to the Dredwood in Fleming's recent post to the ELFBlog.

Posted by Para at 08:41 PM
Dredwood, Dredlocks, and Drakes


Azriel reports on adventures in the Orga Outback and on fighting Forest Drakes in East Field in his most recent journal entry.

Posted by Para at 08:34 PM
November 20, 2004
Vermine Portal Issues


Soul Hunter sent the following report to TMN:

"I had just come through the portal (you can't see the portal in this image; it was between flickers) and became totally surrounded by vermine. This is bad news when you have no Mentus. I had to call for the party to come back and retrieve me from my embarrassment."

Posted by Para at 12:56 AM
November 19, 2004
A Tale of Destine...y


Rhone sent the following announcement to TMN:

"Behold the mighty power of second circle fighters, healers, a single third circle warrior, and an absent apprentice mystic! This is what has become of Clan Destine. Bow before the blessed zu of Gaia! The impromptu tactics of Clan Destine has opened up a world of exciting adventures. As shown by the sketch above, we most recently defeated the noids. Where will this motley crew show up next?!?! No one knows! We were never here!"

Posted by Para at 07:55 PM
Hard to Say It's Over


Poesy's latest journal entry discusses the difficulties of writing a good ending for a song.

Posted by Para at 07:09 PM
November 18, 2004
OpenGL Clan Lord Client v364


Version 364 of the OpenGL Clan Lord Client is available for use. Please be aware that it is beta software, and that the user assumes all risk. Also, as with any volunteer effort, there's no guarantee it will always be available. Many clanners use it and are quite happy with it. If you have reports on using the OpenGL Clan Lord Client, you can join in on the ongoing discussion on Clan Lord Sentinel.

Also, please note there is now a QuickDraw version, which may work well on some older systems.

Posted by Para at 05:29 AM
November 17, 2004
Chaos Storm #364


Chaos Storm #364 has swept the Lok'Groton island chain. Please post any changes you have observed and wish to share with others in the comments. If you don't want to read possible spoilers, please do not read the comments.

Posted by Para at 05:20 PM
November 15, 2004
Meeting with Melabrion


Connie Crete sent the following report to TMN:

"So Melly and Talin had themselves another discussion on tha armor taday. Me, Talin, Garr, Fiona and ‘thea was there ta visit with him. He passed out sum beer and we got down ta talkin.

"Talin had four issues she wanted ta git out in tha open about tha armor deal.

"1) It be total separate ta tha mystic deal. Melly says 'no problemo, separate deal, sure, whatever.'

"2) There be sum way fer ta know what we is gitn befer we gits it. (i.e. testin.) Melly says 'nopers, not gonna lend it out.' He then explained that he don't trust us ta give it back and he don't wanna be ripped off. Garr suggested collateral, but Melly says there's nuthin he wants ta hold that aint in tha price already. Talin suggested a controlled test where his guys was wearin tha armor but by then Melly’s patience with sayin 'nope, not gonna happen' were used up so we went on ta tha next point.

"3) Sumhow be able ta know how much we has donated so she don't gotta keep tha close tally. He said he'd work on teachin Sarir how ta communicate how much been gived, but it weren't a trivial thing. Then he said sumthin about it bein as hard ta teach a Sarir ta do sumthin after it'd been gived its duties as it were ta keep a certain dorf shober in nwf. That last bit were lost in translation.

"4) Plannin o tha exchange o tha armor when it be paid fer. He said he were cool with tha 'community' (his air quotes, not mine) agreein on who got what so long as Phineas were guaranteed a piece. He were as surprised as tha rest ta find out that Phin were gonna meet with an accident shortly after tha next skinnin contest gits announced.

"After we hit them points he gave us summore beer and went on his way."

Posted by Para at 06:14 AM
November 14, 2004
ELF Hunts Scarmis Pit


Kazik has posted an account on the ELF Blog of the recent ELF hunt to the Scarmis Pit and the Dark Chamber.

Posted by Para at 07:00 PM


Creed sent the following report to TMN:

"I came across an interesting phenomenon while on a Clan Destine hunt to the River Tunnel. I had never been down the little path that leads to Stubble, the Darshak who sells axes (to some exiles, anyway). So I took a quick side jaunt just to see the area.

"Just for fun, when I saw the inviting surf, I equipped my fishing rod and cast a line out. Imagine my surprise when the hook and bobber landed in the sand on the beach . . . yet worked perfectly and reeled in a fish!

"I tried several more times, and no matter what direction I faced, I found myself sandfishing. I never could get the hook to land in the water! All I can say is that I find strange things around nearly every corner on our island!"

Posted by Para at 02:28 AM
November 11, 2004
Fishing, Locating, and Teaching


In her most recent journal entry, Himitsu reports on her experiences with fishing, her work on the quest of Ma Tota, and her new position with the University of Puddleby.

Posted by Para at 07:48 PM
Dances with White Wolf

Azriel and friends party like its 999

Azriel reports in his most recent journal entry on trips to the Dredwood, the Ethereal Trading Post, and Gungla Island. The infamous Experiment #9 makes a cameo appearance.

Posted by Para at 07:27 PM
Server DNS Problems


Ann GM reports that players may have problems reaching the Clan Lord server right now. Instructions for a workaround can be found on the Sentinel.


Posted by Para at 06:27 PM
November 08, 2004
Slime Visits East Field


Phiros sent the following report to TMN:

"After investigating a dank disturbance coming from the marsh, I decided to go take a peek. Shortly after arriving in East Field South, I was surrounded, and promply inhaled, by many Large Slimes. Several never-before-seen creatures were also in their midst, including Larva Meshra (which feasted on the fallens), Gravid Meshras, and another variety, which I can't at the moment identify. The new meshras are deep red and charcoal in color."


Posted by Para at 11:48 PM
Power Now


Lundar reports on a Scarmis rescue in the most recent update to the ELF Blog.

Posted by Para at 06:59 AM
November 07, 2004
Spring Farms Cleaning Hunt 4


Farhope and the Winds of Dawn clan are organizing a Fourth Edition of the Spring Farms Cleaning Hunt today.

Says Farhope: "It's time to show again to the farmers that we support them ... and to the vermines that we will kill them all when they dare to invade our farms."

The hunt will happen Spring 68 of 556 at 3:58 P.M. Exiles will meet in the north farm. Exiles will meet in the north farm. The site says the time is OOC: November 7, 2004 at 1 P.M. PDT, 9 P.M. GMT; that may be incorrect, however, because it's now PST here on the west coast of the U.S., not PDT. Perhaps one of the organizers can clarify?

Posted by Para at 06:52 AM
Sentinel Returns


Looks like the Clan Lord Sentinel is working now.

Posted by Para at 06:25 AM
Melabrion Emerges


Connie Crete sent the following report to TMN:

"Mellybeby popped out ta his conference room taday.

"Short story:

"Talin negotiated a meetin with tha courier. Talin mentioned a deal sumone wanted ta perpose ta Melly. Fer sum reason, he were less'n trustin but open ta tha possibility. And so we left him with Talin workin on another meetin ta further tha negotiations. Mostly she be wantin ta make clear this deal be total separate from tha mystic deal.

"The rest of tha story:

"Talin, Shaky, tha Sheriff, Vanye, Bulgatra and me was keelin munkies and when we'd cleared em we decided ta pop round and say 'beer'. Kojiro and Ippon and Gorvin joined us in tha conference room. Like allays, Melly put out sum beer fer us ta drink.

"We ran inta sum o his guards and a couple o golums up in his conference room. It seems he were sendin em off onna errand at Tenny's house. He says it be dangerous up in his brother's keep. As soon as he gots alla his stuff, like tha clothes Tenny borryed and didn't return, then Phin, Stinky, and Xepel kin bard it out fer tha place.

"He says Tenny be still sick but he's got folks lookin after him. In tha mean time, dont believe what Tenny says.

"Shaky and Ippon and Vanye repeatedly asked fer pass keys. He said nope. Koj asked ifn he talked with my accent and nopers, he dont. Ippon quizzed him about tha clans o tha east, but he were clueless. Koj yelled at him which seemed ta hack him off a bit. Shaky decided he were a long lost brother.

"Noivad and Ippon asked ifn they could git tha armor. He said 'yeppers' They asked how and he said tha price from tha last negotiation. He asked tha status on Phin's composition. We had ta say that he were 'workin on it' and it'd be dun 'soon.' Shaky also wanted ta try ta talk him down in price even more.

"After a luvly chat and beer, he showed us ta tha door and we parted ways."

Posted by Para at 05:41 AM
Fishing Guide Updated


Himitsu has updated her Fishing Guide with new information about the fishing cooler.

Posted by Para at 05:32 AM
November 06, 2004
Writing Music Is Hard


In her latest journal entry, Poesy discusses the difficulties with writing good music.


Poesy also provides a link to Baraboo's Guide to Writing Songs That Don't Suck.

Posted by Para at 05:04 PM
Norm's Journal on Hiatus


Unfortunately, Norm has placed his long-running journal on hiatus as of 64 Spring 556 (11/6/04). I look forward to the time when Norm resumes publication of his excellent diary.

I very much encourage new exiles to take up the pen and publish accounts of their adventures. We could use some more journals.

In other news, I have added the journals of Drablak and Poesy to the TMN favorites section. Also, I finally made a long-delayed change: I raised the right column level to that of the left in preparation for some future improvements.

Posted by Para at 04:12 PM
November 05, 2004
OpenGL Client and 10.3.6


Reports are coming in to TMN that the OpenGL Client and the newly released Mac OS X 10.3.6 are not getting along well.


Version 362a of the OpenGL Client should address the issues with 10.3.6.

Posted by Para at 09:30 PM
Dragon Fun


In his most recent journal entry, Sunblaze reports on his experiences during the Feast of Tssrin and his satisfaction with getting to wear his dragon costume.

Posted by Para at 09:24 PM
Exploring the Fringe


Azriel reports in his latest journal entry on exploring the Fringe and on the recent Feast of Tsrrin.

Posted by Para at 06:41 PM
November 04, 2004
Local Sylvans Twitch, Congeal


Read all about it in the latest ELF Meeting Minutes.

Posted by Para at 08:04 AM
Sentinel Status


The Clan Lord Sentinel is back.


Vagile seeks volunteers for a new Sentinel logo.

Update 2:

The Sentinel is offline for now.

Posted by Para at 04:41 AM
November 03, 2004
Slyph Has a Bad Day

File footage of Slyph having a bad day

Slyph is having a bad day today.

Sentinel will be back soon.

It's Chaos Storm time.

More reports as events warrant.

Posted by Para at 05:53 PM
Chaos Storm #362


Chaos Storm #362 has swept the Lok'Groton island chain. Please post any changes you have observed and wish to share with others in the comments. If you don't want to read possible spoilers, please do not read the comments.

Posted by Kiriel at 05:49 PM
Sentinel Will Return Soon


Vagile sent the following announcement to TMN:

"The Sentinel will be down for a while. I hope to have it back sometime Wednesday."

Posted by Para at 06:16 AM